


I Must Think of a New Life

by StatisticalCats (GorillaMoon)



Category: Cats - Andrew Lloyd Webber
Genre: F/M, Mentions of miscarriage, Other, mentions of abuse, nothing graphic but be aware
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:28:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24248047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GorillaMoon/pseuds/StatisticalCats
Summary: Demeter had been so happy when she told Munkustrap they were going to be parents. Now she was nervous and scared, and Munkustrap doesn't know why.
Relationships: Demeter/Munkustrap (Cats)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 35





	I Must Think of a New Life

Munkustrap readied himself as he spotted Jennyanydots making her way towards him with an obvious air of purpose. He knew this was going to happen sooner or later. If not Jennyanydots, then Jellylorum, or Skimbleshanks, or maybe even Lily or Florin. You’d have to be pretty oblivious to not notice the sense of unease, and worried whispers going around the Tribe. Or the reason for the concern.

“Hello, Jenny.” he greeted the Gumbie cat as she reached him, doing his best at a warm smile.

“Munkustrap.” She greeted him in such a warm and caring tone, he felt some regret for how tense he was at her approach. He bent to meet her in a nuzzle, knowing from the look in her eyes that his stress wasn’t unnoticed.

“How has Gus been doing?” he asked. The theatre cat had caught a touch of illness and was requiring more care than usual. Rather opportune timing to delay this conversation.

“He’s doing well. Still recovering but getting back to his normal self. How is Demeter? She hasn’t come to see me or Jellylorum in a while.” 

_So much for delaying._

“She’s doing well, too.” he replied lightly.

“Munkustrap.” There was a warning in her tone, though not an unkind one. He deflated some in response and she sighed. “You can’t just ignore this. This isn’t just about you, it’s about the whole Tribe.”

Munkustrap crossed his arms, knowing she was right but unsure what to do. How did it get like this?

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He could still clearly remember how happy Demeter had been when she had told him the news. _They were going to be parents._

Munkustrap felt he could have burst from the joy that swelled inside him, and that joy was contagious. There was an excited happiness that spread over the Tribe as the news spread that their future Leader and his Mate were expecting their first kitten. The first potential Heir of a new generation. A positive energy settled over the Junkyard and everything and everyone felt wonderful and full of hope.

Then Demeter’s mood changed completely.

She no longer seemed happy and excited. She became extremely nervous and even fearful. Munkustrap had even overheard others saying they had seen or heard Demeter hidden away, crying. 

Munkustrap knew that mood swings weren’t unusual for an expectant mother. He hadn’t been _too_ worried at first, but as time went on, Demeter’s mood not only continued to get worse, but started to spread over the Tribe, wiping away all the previous joy.

It left Munkustrap feeling unsure what to do. He wanted to help and comfort his Mate but he was afraid of upsetting her even further if he questioned her. Bombalurina had tried to approach her sister, but had apparently gotten nowhere, and was just as lost as Munkustrap over what had caused this distress. Demeter was always a somewhat nervous and suspicious queen, but things hadn’t been this bad for some time. It reminded Munkustrap of when she had first joined the Tribe, after escaping from Macavity.

It left the Tribe on edge, worrying over the state of the Heir’s Mate. The Tribe already knew the effects of a Leader-Mate that didn’t want to be a parent. And Munkustrap knew the effects of a mother that didn’t want her kittens.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I don’t know how to approach her about it.” he finally admitted.

Jenny gave a small smile through the worry. “Be patient and gentle. But…” her expression fell as she tried to keep her tone as delicate as she could. “Keep a clear head. Demeter’s a lovely queen, and she’s part of the Tribe. But not everyone in a tribe is fit for an authority role.”

His fur bristled and he had to clamp down the reflexive angry defense of his Mate. For a moment, he thought he now understood how his father could have stood by his mother all those years. But the logical part of him knew Jenny wasn’t insulting Demeter, but was almost as worried about her as he was. 

Her expression softened and she placed a paw on his arm. “And putting all of that aside, there should be no secrets between Mates, no matter their Tribe status.”

“I won’t force her to tell me anything if it’s too upsetting for her.” he stated, a hard edge to his tone.

“I’m not asking you to force her to do anything.” she replied gently. “But you can’t just let this go on without doing anything. Talk to her. Be there for her. However you need to be.”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Demeter was curled up in a nest of assorted blankets when Munkustrap carefully entered their den. He hoped it was a good idea to do this in the comforting surroundings of their Junkyard home. Demeter did at least look a bit calmer than she had been recently.

“Hello, love.” he greeted with a soft smile, slowly settling in beside her.

Her eyes were tired as she looked up at him. In fact, all of her seemed tired, perhaps the reason for her relative calmness. 

“Everyone’s talking.” she numbly stated in lieu of a greeting. Her gaze fell again and she cradled her belly.

“They’re worried about you.” he replied carefully. “ _I’m_ worried about you.” He paused as he searched for words. “Are you.... Do you… _want_ this kitten?” He grimaced. That ended up not coming out well.

She sharply turned her gaze to him and tightened her hold of her belly. “ _Of course_ I want this kitten!” Offense laced her tone and Munkustrap held up his paws in an apologetic gesture. 

“It’s just that… you were so happy at the beginning. And now you’re not.” 

She dropped her gaze and nibbled at her lip in response. A nervous silence stretched between the pair, and Munkustrap was trying to formulate how best to proceed when Demeter spoke up again.

“It’s not really that I’m not happy....” she stated softly. “I’m just....” Her eyes darted around nervously and she squeezed her belly again. “I’m really scared.” 

Panic bloomed in his chest. “Is it the kitten? Should I get Jenny?”

“No, no!” She stopped him as he made to get up. “Well… it _is_ about the kitten… but I don’t need Jenny.”

His concern didn’t lessen. “What do you mean?”

She was silent for a few moments, breathing deeply, and caressing her belly. 

“I’m scared about Macavity.” she admitted quietly. 

He let himself relax some in the knowledge of there being no immediate threat. _Of course. Macavity._ He didn’t know how he hadn’t thought that his older brother was what was bothering Demeter. Time had passed since she and her sister had escaped Macavity’s tribe, but the years spent there still held lasting grips on them, Demeter especially. The Jellicle Tribe was no stranger to his cruelty either.

“I won’t say to not worry at all about him.” Munkustrap knew all too well how it felt to have such concerns ignored. “But there will always be someone to watch for threats, Macavity included.”

She nodded absently but seemed to still be plagued with a heavy, unspoken worry.

“He won’t hurt you and our kitten.” Munkustrap declared firmly.

“He has before.” she replied so quietly he almost didn’t hear despite their close proximity. 

His ears twitched as his mind raced. Had Macavity gotten to Demeter with no one knowing? Had he been in the Junkyard? Her human home? Before he could ask any of those questions, she spoke again, voice still weak and quiet.

“I’ve been pregnant before. By Macavity.”

It shouldn’t have been so surprising to Munkustrap. He knew Macavity had kept Demeter as his “Mate” (though Munkustrap loathed using a word which was supposed to mean something beautiful to describe what Macavity and Demeter had). But she had never even hinted at any kittens. _Was she forced to leave them behind?_

“He didn’t want me to birth his kittens.” she continued, voice shaking. “He wanted magical kittens. I have no magic. I would try to hide it but… he found out. He was so angry. I don’t know why he never considered it would inevitably happen at some point…” 

She twitched and fidgeted as she spoke. It made little sense, but she still found it difficult to speak of Macavity in such a way. To ever imply he was wrong or unthinking in anything he said or did. “He was so angry.” she repeated. “So violently angry. He didn’t want my kittens to be born. So he ensured they wouldn’t be.” 

She broke completely then, tears quickly turning into weeping, and Munkustrap could barely think through his actions, automatically moving closer, wrapping his arms around her, and holding her as close as he could. Thankfully, she was receptive to his comfort and clung to him as she let her grief out.

Munkustrap’s thoughts swirled uncontrollably, a heavy weight settling in his stomach and heart at this new knowledge of just how unbelievably cruel his older brother could be. He could barely even process the thought of causing such harm. Somehow, he hadn’t thought even Macavity could be so cruel.

He found he could do nothing but whisper comforting words to his Mate, tightening his embrace of her. He wondered if this was the first time she had ever _truly_ let herself fully acknowledge and grieve over what had happened. The kittens she’d lost. The image of her joyful eyes and smile from the beginning of this pregnancy, so full of love, appeared in his mind. It was awful to see that joy taken away from her by horrible memories, and a silent ball of rage flared in Munkustrap at how Macavity could deliberately steal such joy and love away with no remorse.

His mind focused back to Demeter as her weeping calmed and she spoke again. “I know I’m as safe as I could ever be. I _know_ that. But I just can’t stop being scared. Scared he’ll take this all away from me.”

He pulled slightly away to face her. “Demeter… I know I can’t take those feelings away. And I can’t even begin to imagine what you’ve gone through, what you’re _going_ through. But I _can_ promise you that I would do _anything_ to protect you and our kitten. _No one_ will hurt you, hurt them, as long as I’m still breathing.”

She looked him in the eyes, finding firm honesty in them. She steadied her breathing and her own eyes flashed with a new strength. “As long as I’m still breathing, too.” she stated, possessively clutching both her belly and her Mate. 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Jenny approached him again the next day, Munkustrap didn’t tell her all that he now knew. He had braced himself for her to be upset at him withholding any potentially important information from her but after fixing him with a rather long and intense stare after he told her he had talked with Demeter and he was sure things would be fine, she apparently found what she had been looking for in his eyes and firmly nodded her head, pleased.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Demeter’s pregnancy continued with no threats and before they knew it, she had given birth to a daughter. Jenny, Jelly, Munkustrap, and Bombalurina had all been gathered in the couples’ den to welcome the new kitten. But before too long, at the tired mother’s request, Demeter and Munkustrap were left alone. 

Well, not completely alone. Munkustrap didn’t think his gaze had ever strayed from his daughter since the moment she was born. Demeter clutched the kitten to her side, a little bundle of black, red, and white fur. Munkustrap had thought he had felt as full of love as was possible just with Demeter, but gazing at his little daughter and his Mate left him surprised he hadn’t literally burst from how much love he was feeling. For a small moment, in the very back of his mind, he could _almost_ understand how his father could still love.... He shook that thought away, unwilling to let anything taint this happiness.

He met Demeter’s eyes and found her face alight with just as much love and happiness, if not more. Her eyes were wet with gathered tears, her joy laced with some bittersweet emotion, but joy nonetheless. He settled down beside her, their daughter nestled between them. He draped an arm gently across both his kitten and Mate. No words were spoken, the new family simply existing in this moment, letting the joyful atmosphere settle around them. The Tribe would be wanting to meet the new arrival as soon as possible but for now they enjoyed each others’ presence alone, silently renewing their promises. Neither would _ever_ let anything bad happen to their family.


End file.
